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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
#27
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I suggest the insults on my personality go under General Discussion, call it "Creative Conquests is a Drama Queen" and cut me down a thousand ways to Friday, I don't care.

I won't allow the lowest common denominator on this board reduce on my experience. I was followed. Why judge ME about it and how about instead, EMPOWER others to do it right. To keep with the original purpose of my post:

From ehow.com
HOW TO PROTECT ONESELF IF BEING FOLLOWED HOME:

While walking home
Step
1
Cross the street and notice to see if the person you suspect is following you also crosses.

Step
2
Walk to a well lit area as quickly as possible. If there is a business near by, such as a store, that is open, go into the store. If there is not a business around, keep walking and if the person following you gets closer, start running. If you need to attract attention, yell "Fire."

Step
3
Tell the person inside of the business that you are being followed and ask to use the telephone to call the police.

Step
4
Provide the police with as accurate of a description as possible of the person who was following you if the suspect leaves before the police arrive. It is also good if you can tell the police what direction he headed in when he left your location.

While driving home
Step
1
Change directions and start driving the other way. Pay attention to see if the car is still following you.

Step
2
Drive to the closest Police of Fire Department if there is one near by. Blow your horn when you get into the driveway if the other car pulls in behind you. Keep blowing your horn until a Police or Fire man comes out of the building to assist you.

Step
3
Pull into a well lit parking lot of a business that is open if there is not a near by Police or Fire Department. Again, do not get out of your car. Blow your horn to attract attention and wait for people to come out of the business to assist. Chances are good that once you start attracting attention the person following you leaves.

Step
4
Call the Police from your cell phone or ask to use the phone at the business. Give the police the make, model and color of the car that was following you. It is also good if you can tell them the license plate number, the direction that the car went when it left you, and a description of the driver if you were able to see her.

----
Want to say good-bye to those I cared about over the years on this site who provided with me fun drivel, hilarious insights, serious debate, helpful updates, drunken regretful posts and the like. Thanks to Webmaster for providing this community tool. It was entertaining and informative for a while. But the responses on my post on Crime & Safety are a sign the bottom feeders are seeking fuel and they've found a home. I'm out.

Posted on: 2010/2/17 14:46
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
#26
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To all the negatives - Should she had called the police? Yes.
But it's one thing to read this story in hindsight. It's a scary situation when you're in it and you don't always do everything right. "Stupid" is out of line.

Since I am not familiar with CC being melodramatic, I have to take this on face value. Thanks for posting to warn others and glad you're safe.

Posted on: 2010/2/17 12:38
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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I put this up as a service to other woman. Just in case. But wow, in true JCLIST fashion - some of you will never cease to amaze me. Your comments are beyond hurtful and really represent the sour note on this site. But this time, I won't write off jclist for the sad individuals who feel entitled to put me down or dilute my intention or think reliving a post from over a year ago about ice cream is worth bringing up when I am placing something important and factual in CRIME & SAFETY. But rather, I encourage other women who when faced with these circumstances, stay strong on how they handled it and please don't let these trollers deter you from posting so we can always be more safe than sorry in this community.

Maybe this will be more useful if people posted how they've approached these situations in the past and we can learn from it. Fear at the moment something happens that threatens our safety can make our judgement do funny things and knowing more is power.

Maybe we can learn how to be KIND and EMPATHETIC too rather than calling a female concerned for her safety STUPID and DUMB or MELODRAMATIC? Or accuse me of patting myself on the back for taking steps at the time to protect myself? Or that my imagination got the best of me? Do you really believe your comments to be appropriate? Should I have your voice in my head next time this happens and doubt myself and think I'm just being 'dramatic' and press on home ignoring my intuition that perhaps something is amiss? HURTFUL and just plain, pathetically WRONG.

Posted on: 2010/2/17 7:31
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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Quote:

caps wrote:
... remember that post she wrote "hubby" like a 50 times in a row....(that's for the old schoolers)


Oh God that's funny. I do remember that. And now that you put it in that perspective I have a whole new interpretation of this. I can easily see how this is a case of someone's imagination getting the best of them. I can also see the argument of better safe than sorry. But now that I know that this was from the same person that kept saying "hubby" all the time I feel it's the former.

Posted on: 2010/2/17 5:40
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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I was once followed from the Grove street station during rush hour about a year and a half ago. I just happened to be going to my Tae Kwon Do school anyways, so that is where I ducked into. I figured that a) he would realize that if I am going to that school, he should think twice and b) I have a posse inside the school!

I totally agree with Curtis_luvva. I had actually asked my TKD teacher what I should do if that happens again. He told me to turn and confront the person. Usually the person, if they are initially following, don't know what they are going to do right away since they haven't done it yet. This will catch them off their guard. Also it gives you the opportunity to know what they look like.

You did the right thing. But you should have said something to someone, other than your hubby who wasn't there to help. As for all you nay-sayers, well I am assuming you are men. If you haven't been put into these situations, then don't reply. She doesn't need negative feedback. She was just supplying some information.

Quote:

curtis_luvva wrote:
Stopping into a bar or another public place was a good idea, but telling the bartender why would be better. When the creep walked in, it would have been 2 on 1. Most losers back down quickly when confronted.

Imagine if he'd followed you into the ladies?!

Posted on: 2010/2/17 4:55
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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Again, you are STUPID for not having called the cops. What if the guy had been dangerous (like jealous) and attacked you and your husband? This is exactly the kind of situation the cops are for. Stop patting yourself on the back for calling your husband, and for going into a restaurant. If it had been very early or late there might not have been a restaurant to duck into. I am a woman and if some ahole had done that to me, I would have called the cops.

Posted on: 2010/2/17 3:53
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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Posted on: 2010/2/17 2:01
My humor is for the silent blue collar majority - If my posts offend, slander or you deem inappropriate and seek deletion, contact the webmaster for jurisdiction.
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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I'm glad your safe, but waiting in a bar for 90 min and not calling the police, just weird.

Posted on: 2010/2/17 1:44
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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creativeconquests is a melodramatic drama queen in my opinion, i could be wrong but after reading all her rants throughout the years i think it may be much less accurate than not... remember that post she wrote "hubby" like a 50 times in a row....(that's for the old schoolers) not that it has anything to do with this.. just saying. (in fact, in that thread, if i remember correctly, i believe she swore off jclist for good, perhaps that's why i remember it so well)..conceivably this did happen but i highly doubt it was as dramatic as she has stated...just my opinion. just be careful and aware as anyone should be in an urban environment. if it was as dramatic as she stated i apologize in advance. just my thoughts.

Posted on: 2010/2/17 1:00
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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Quote:
Sorry but you really come off stupid for not immediately calling the cops. The guy was right there! Hanging out!! And you didn't call the cops? Just plain DUMB. If your not sure about someone let the cops sort it out. An opportunity missed and a creep still on the loose to do who knows what.


This.

Posted on: 2010/2/17 0:39
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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Sorry but you really come off stupid for not immediately calling the cops. The guy was right there! Hanging out!! And you didn't call the cops? Just plain DUMB. If your not sure about someone let the cops sort it out. An opportunity missed and a creep still on the loose to do who knows what.

Posted on: 2010/2/17 0:31
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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+1 for stopping in a public place.

I'm more confrontational, maybe because I have some built up anger against creeps. I probably would have lured him into the bar and then confronted him publicly with "excuse me stop following me. You're making me feel very uncomfortable" I once flicked a cigarette at a guy for cat calling me on the street yelling "you talk to your mother with that mouth? creep!" He resorted to calling me white trash, so I went back at him with "do you really want strange guys talking to your mother or sister the way you do to me?" he immediately backed off and apologized. I don't mess around with these guys.

Posted on: 2010/2/16 23:27
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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Stopping into a bar or another public place was a good idea, but telling the bartender why would be better. When the creep walked in, it would have been 2 on 1. Most losers back down quickly when confronted.

Imagine if he'd followed you into the ladies?!

Posted on: 2010/2/16 22:25
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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If you see this dude again, just call the cops, regardless if it may come off as panic driven, better to be safe then sorry.

Oh and yes, carry a canister of mace, just in case, in todays world unfortunatley nothing can be taken for granted.

Good luck and stay safe.

Posted on: 2010/2/16 20:55
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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Quote:

heights wrote:
Quote:

creativeconquests wrote:
Quote:

SICULO wrote:
Is it safe to assume that by the time your husband met you, this stalker was allready gone?

You didn't provide those details?


As far as we know, yes. When my spouse came (I had texted him a full description just in case he ran in to him loitering outside still) he didn't see the man. We stayed an hour at the restaurant just to make sure (didn't want him following me home). We planned to take a cab to reduce on that risk, but felt we were cautious enough and didn't notice anyone following us home.

You should have taken the cab to reduce that risk. Now the real question is what is your agenda for the next commute coming home from work ? You should take different routes, at different times. If you sense him again notify the POLICE !


I agree. My biggest regret is not cabbing it. But we were very cautious and didn't see anyone and probably wait more like 90 minutes first. Thanks for your concern. Very nice.

Posted on: 2010/2/16 20:32
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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Quote:

creativeconquests wrote:
Quote:

SICULO wrote:
Is it safe to assume that by the time your husband met you, this stalker was allready gone?

You didn't provide those details?


As far as we know, yes. When my spouse came (I had texted him a full description just in case he ran in to him loitering outside still) he didn't see the man. We stayed an hour at the restaurant just to make sure (didn't want him following me home). We planned to take a cab to reduce on that risk, but felt we were cautious enough and didn't notice anyone following us home.

You should have taken the cab to reduce that risk. Now the real question is what is your agenda for the next commute coming home from work ? You should take different routes, at different times. If you sense him again notify the POLICE !

Posted on: 2010/2/16 18:44
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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Quote:

SICULO wrote:
Is it safe to assume that by the time your husband met you, this stalker was allready gone?

You didn't provide those details?


As far as we know, yes. When my spouse came (I had texted him a full description just in case he ran in to him loitering outside still) he didn't see the man. We stayed an hour at the restaurant just to make sure (didn't want him following me home). We planned to take a cab to reduce on that risk, but felt we were cautious enough and didn't notice anyone following us home.

Posted on: 2010/2/16 18:19
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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Is it safe to assume that by the time your husband met you, this stalker was allready gone?

You didn't provide those details?

Posted on: 2010/2/16 17:51
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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Quote:

Bike_Lane wrote:
Did he look like this?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OVDtzBeap7I


I wish. If that fella sat down beside me with that 'stache and red latex suit......meow!

Posted on: 2010/2/16 17:05
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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I had some weird old guy making clicking noises and other strange sounds from inside the Mens Room stall at the Jersey Avenue Library... but anyway...

You are right -- this dude is clearly a stalker -- but Heights maybe you wouldn't get arrested if you were a...

"tall, slim Indian man, in his late 20's/early 30's, smoker, longish hair down to his chin, kind of hipster, about 6'2", wide bridged nose, jeans, navy sweatshirt with hoodie...he either wants a date or..."

Quote:

heights wrote:

... if I tried that they would lock me up and throw away the key.

Posted on: 2010/2/16 16:39
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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Posted on: 2010/2/16 16:32
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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Quote:

GrovePath wrote:
Quote:

bill wrote:
stop, no offense but when was the last time you read about an Indian being the attacker and not the victim?

It was primetime with lots of foot traffic - so sounds more like a romantic nerdy hipster want-to-be looking for love. But better safe than sorry...

so sounds more like a romantic nerdy "stalker" want-to-be looking for love...what a plan, if I tried that they would lock me up and throw away the key. It's a good thing her husband wasn't around otherwise hubby's reaction would put hubby in the hoose-gow

Posted on: 2010/2/16 16:09
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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Quote:

bill wrote:
stop, no offense but when was the last time you read about an Indian being the attacker and not the victim?


It was primetime with lots of foot traffic - so sounds more like a romantic nerdy hipster want-to-be looking for love.

But better safe than sorry...

Posted on: 2010/2/16 15:44
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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bill wrote:
stop, no offense but when was the last time you read about an Indian being the attacker and not the victim?

*depends on what and when you read
*there is a first time for everything
*at least it is a low percentage but all it takes is one time
*it also has been a while since I read an Indian was the victim.

Posted on: 2010/2/16 15:38
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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stop, no offense but when was the last time you read about an Indian being the attacker and not the victim?

Posted on: 2010/2/16 15:29
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Re: Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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He may feel an entitlement, or perhaps he is in this country alone on a work visa and is in need of a woman (female companionship). Lots of these exported/inverted-outsourced men and not limited to any one group that work here are looking for a girl in every port.

Posted on: 2010/2/16 15:21
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Followed home last night from Grove Street PATH
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I was followed home yesterday coming out of the Grove Street PATH station by a man. I realized what was happening very quickly when I felt someone close to me in my peripheral who I just couldn't shake. Although a lot of foot traffic at 7:30 at night walking on Newark, my instincts told me something was up when I slowed or sped up my pace - he kept pace, if I stopped, he would duck in to a storefront doorway and wait, when I crossed the street, he did. I quickly ducked in to a restaurant to call my husband to pick me up. After several minutes, the man was bold enough to enter the restaurant and sit down at the bar beside me. I immediately went to the restroom and when I returned I saw him lurking outside periodically peeking through the window. I'm sure he thought he was stealth in his lurking moves and went unnoticed but he underestimated a woman's intuition and instincts. I couldn't see him there after about 20 minutes. My husband came and we walked home unfollowed.

Who knows, he could have been a romantic building up the courage to ask me on a date, LOL - but in these parts? Bad judgement. Either way, if any other females are being followed off the Grove Street PATH train by a tall, slim Indian man, in his late 20's/early 30's, smoker, longish hair down to his chin, kind of hipster, about 6'2", wide bridged nose, jeans, navy sweatshirt with hoodie...he either wants a date or something sinister....if you are the dude reading this, maybe find another way to meet a woman. If you were up to something sinister...you are on notice pal.

Posted on: 2010/2/16 15:11
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